Even If You’re Never Awake

Inspired by and To be read aloud to:
Stars of the Lid - Even If You're Never Awake

Even If You’re Never Awake

The sky will be filled with light
regardless of whether or not
it happens to be the middle of the day
or the absolute center of the night

Your eyes will still squint slightly, as you look upward
at the sun tossing down its warmth to you like ribbons
the glow will stay on the inside of your eyelids even after
you’ve squeezed them
Oh, so tight.

Or
stars will be there circling around your head
its been a long time since you were the center of everything
and its only because you are there to look at them
that they glow so fervently, so terrifyingly bright

Even if you’re never awake

castles will still remind you of childhood
and fantastic adventures,
even as you walk
right up to one, wondering whether or not you should
knock on that thick wooden door

you’ll still feel tingles from the anticipation
of the stone scraping against the wood
and look, now, underneath your feet
the moat is made of clouds with neon blue seaweed
your ice-cream shoes are starting to melt

Now the door’s swung open
and you’ve been ushered in
admist the king and queen and courtroom.
a feast of sound is carried out
a dance is about to begin

But you speak in separate languages
and won’t be understood

Even If You’re Never Awake

You’ll still get a bit embarrassed
when your eyes meet across the bus
not knowing if she’s real or not
but hoping that she must
be that one who you had met
as a child, in the museum
surrounded by old skeletons,
ruins from Siam,
and rooms filled with thunder

you had been too nervous to say anything
so you just wrote it down
and right now as you drop your glance
that same note is on the ground

Pick it up

its wings are long and delicate
resting on your finger
about to take off with the breeze
the patterns on its face are simple

but this is your stop

and even if you’re never awake
you need to get off the bus sometime
so you fold the note and slip it into your pocket
stifling the tiny screams
because even if you’re never awake
sometimes, things are better off left unsaid
better off unseen
(even in dreams).

Even if you’re never awake
you will still feel safe in your bed
wrapped up in wrinkled sheets
asleep on your side, even though
you know
its bad for your back

no one dares disturb you
if they try you won’t respond
right now
you’re lying breathless
on the bottom of a pond
and all the day’s responsibilities
get lost somewhere on the surface
and all the other fishes
forget what they’ve confessed

and light shines down ribbons
to the bottom of the pond
but it won’t wake you
not yet,
not til all the water’s gone
your eyes,
they flutter open
even if you’re never awake
the sun’s still up at dawn.